Have you been through some things that are so dark, painful, so worrisome or so confusing that you haven’t been able to fully function properly in your life for weeks, for months or even for years?
Perhaps you suffered from issues in your previous marriage, health issues, abuse, rejection, maybe you were fired from your job, perhaps you had a legal issue, maybe you experienced loss or maybe it was multiple things that have affected you and made you feel powerless along the way.
I’m sure you’ve heard the words that time is a healer, and in some cases you have seen this to be true, but I’m also sure that you’ve also noticed that some of the effects of the trauma, pain or issues that you’ve faced on your journey haven’t gone away so easily, maybe you haven’t completely healed from some of these experiences, you still seem to have wounds or you still seem as if you are held back by the last.
If you are wondering what to do to overcome and truly live joyfully, here are some tips to help you break free and begin to fully be you again:
1) Forgive:
Start with forgiveness, whenever you feel so stuck, so trapped, so alone, so withdrawn ask yourself if there is anything that you need to forgive. I’m not asking you to do this because you have done something wrong per see, but I’m asking you to forgive because forgiveness brings healing and it opens doors of freedom. Sometimes you are hurting because something was actually done to you. maybe your fiancé broke up with you or no apparent reason, maybe an ex cheated on you, perhaps you were fired from your place of work unjustly. maybe a friend stabbed you in the back, I’m asking you to forgive toward to receive the healing that God wants to pour into your heart today. Maybe you have also done some things that you need to repent of too and some things that you have done, maybe you also need to forgive yourself. Grab your journal or a piece of paper and write a list of 15 things that come to your mind today that you can forgive and release and spend some time letting go of these things today.
2) Face your Fears:
Facing your fears isn’t always going to be as straight forward as it seems as sometimes you might think it means confronting the past or confronting a person, however you could do all of that and still notice no change, confronting your fears sometimes could be being willing to talk with God, a friend or a counsellor about some of your past experiences, finally confronting the thoughts and buried memories that you haven’t been willing to think about or speak about for years. I’ve felt the Lord asking me to confront some of my fears in this way, to spend time with him (in his presence) and just start speaking to him as if he’s my Counsellor, as the bible says that he is the greatest counsellor. So we should truly let HIM counsel us, heal us and guide us on what we ought to do and not always run to the phone, to social media to get the help that we need. Sometimes just spending regular time in God’s presence is enough. Joyce Meyer once said that she received 90% of her healing (from sexual abuse) by just spending time in the presence of the Lord. God is real, he is powerful and he wants to set you free today.
3) Practice Self-Love:
One of the ways to truly start to heal and be more of you again is to love yourself more bountifully. Love who you are, love who God made you to be, love your quirks, love your imperfections, love your eyes, love your nose, love your tummy, love your thighs, love all of you. Love yourself in a wholesome healthy way (not in a egotistical prideful way), let go of verbal abuse in relation to yourself, stop telling yourself that you aren’t good enough, stop saying that you are fat and ugly, stop mourning over the old you wishing you be your old self again and instead create a new you. Expect God to do a new thing in your life. Confess good things over yourself daily such as ‘I am wonderful’, ‘I am a good person’, ‘I’m becoming better and better each day’, ‘I’m completely fabulous and free’, ‘My Business is growing more and more each day’, ‘I am debt free’, ‘I have excellent people skills’. Also pamper yourself too, spoil yourself every now and then as this can be truly healing for your mind, body and soul. Ideas include going for a weekly facial, going for spa days once a month, hiring a baby sitter and going out with your friends,getting your hair done at the hairdressers once a week buying yourself a box of chocolates or doing something huge for self like buying yourself a new car.
4) Help Someone to be Free:
No matter what you are going through always remember that there is someone out there who doesn’t have a quarter of your blessings, your fortune or your success, no matter how bad it looks someone is suffering far worse than you, I’m it saying this to be heartless or to lessen your experiences but instead I want to remind you of how blessed you are. You are truly blessed my fabulous friend. So think of how you can give back, who can you help, who can you empower, who can you invest in? If you truly want the devil to pay for what he did to you go out there and bless others, give money to Charities, do philanthropy work, invest in someone’s education, help your children, be more patient with others, visit the elderly, be kinder to your siblings, send presents to children in hospitals, send your old books to libraries, give bigger tips to waitresses. Think of 10 ways to give back and work through this list over the next month and see more blessings come your way (as what you sow is what you reap) Galatians 6: 7.
5) Think of How Far you’ve Come:
You have come so far, you have overcome so many obstacles, you have done some amazing things, you have shown some incredible strength in your life, you have grown, you have been a blessing, you have impacted lives, you have achieved some great goals and mile stones, so I’d love to ask you this…when was the last time that you truly sat down and celebrated your wins? It’s about time that you celebrate my friend because you have really got a lot to celebrate. Taking a moment to celebrate your blessings is one of the best gifts that you can give yourself, celebrate your birthday, celebrate your upcoming anniversary, celebrate the new pay rise that you got, celebrate your financial business breakthrough, think of new and creative ways to celebrate your life and you will truly love and enjoy your life more.
6) Be Willing to Make Changes:
Change isn’t always easy but it’s definitely something that‘s inevitable. Sometimes we spend time blaming our friends, our family, ourselves, we blame God, we blame our exes or whoever we think has let us down, but today is a new day for us to let go of the blame game, it honestly doesn’t matter if someone is to blame for things that have gone wrong in your life (or not), because you have everything it takes to overcome and be fully you again, you have power to get back up and be stronger than you ever were before. In the book “The Success Principles” by Jack Canfield, the first chapter that he lays out is this “Take Full Responsibility for your Life”. I truly believe that this the healthy attitude that we must develop, we need to stop blaming others and look at home base, we need to work on creating new healthy habits, we need to use our words more positivity, we need to be willing to let go of resentment, bitterness and rage, we need to stop feeling so entitled, we need to stop acting like victims and brats (at times too), we need to improve our attitudes and our behaviour so that we can start seeing the changes in our lives that are truly meaningful and delightful. So grab your journal again my friend and write down 5 things that you are willing to start working on towards seeing change in your life. What new healthy habits are you willing to commit to starting from today?.
7) Visualise a Brighter Future:
You have years ahead of you (by God’s amazing grace) so it’s so important that you dream big! Terri Savelle put it this way “Make your Dreams Bigger than your Memories”, one of the ways that we get stuck in our lives and remain at the same level year after year is to have no vision. The bible says this “Where there is no vision, the people perish” – Proverbs 29:18. So if you don’t have a vision of what your future will be like and if you don’t imagine good things it’s highly likely that you won’t be able to let go of the past and move to new heights. So be relentless starting from today, write down your amazing dreams, goals and aspirations and start working on a plan to achieve these exciting things. It’s your time and your moment to move into the new doors of freedom that God has for you and to make the bigger impact in this world that you were truly born to make. But no that God can’t do this for, there’s a part that you need to be willing to do. So go out there, be bolder than ever before my friend and shine brightly.
Now I want to hear from you my friend, be sure to drop a comment below if this has blessed you and also share this on social media. Thank you for being you.
