Book Title(s): Anxiety Diary of an Ordinary Girl
Social Media Link(s):
What is your backstory? How did you find your calling?
If you asked me 5 years ago if I thought I would be getting ready for my own book to launch and spending a significant amount of time advocating for mental health-related matters, I would have probably laughed at you. Up until I started having panic attacks in 2015, I never invested any time into learning about mental health and mental health disorders.
Starting in 2015, I began having panic attacks and very anxious episodes during the period where I was taking the CPA exam. I put a lot of pressure on myself and had very little self-esteem and self-confidence. During that period, I was put on Xanax and sent on my merry way. When things got worse, I was given Zoloft which ended up giving me suicidal ideations. It was a terrifying experience.
After that, I got into therapy and tried to resume my normal life. A few months after I started therapy, I was back to my normal self and stopped working towards an improved state of mental health. I just got lazy. Fast forward a year and a half later and the panic attacks started all over again, except it was worse this time. I got back in therapy in hopes of overcoming my anxiety.
Because I wasn’t doing the work I needed to, I ended up having a complete mental breakdown in December of 2019. That experience was a huge eye-opener for me. I gained a much greater appreciation for my mental health and the necessity of continuously working on it.
Eventually, I started working harder in therapy and decided to try anxiety medication again. I started opening up to people and sharing my story. I used to feel so alone on this journey and so afraid to talk about it, but once I started sharing, I saw the power of opening up. I had no idea how many people I knew who were suffering and working through a recovery journey just like myself.
Randomly, one day I decided that my purpose in life was to share my story. I wanted to share so that I could be a resource for those in need, a shoulder to lean on, and a kindred spirit during their darkest times. I want people to celebrate their resilience, bravery, and growth instead of living in fear because of the stigmas that exist around mental health disorders. My hope with the book is to start conversations and keep them going, to break down stigmas, and normalize discussions around the importance of mental health.
What do you enjoy the most about what you do?
I get the most joy from the connections I make with people. It is overwhelming how much love I have gotten since I started the birth of my book baby. So many incredible stories have been shared with me, and I feel absolutely honored that these individuals trusted me and felt they could open up. That is my goal with the book, so seeing it come to life makes me so happy.
What is your latest book about? What inspired you to write it?
My book, Anxiety Diary of an Ordinary Girl, is about my journey with anxiety, self-esteem issues, self-love, anxiety treatment, body image, relationships, etc. I want people who can relate to feel like they belong and people who don’t suffer from a mental health disorder to see how having a mental health disorder affects all areas of your life.
Living my life in fear because of the many stigmas that exist was the inspiration to write. I hated that I felt trapped in a box for so long. I thought something was wrong with me and that no one would ever want someone like me in their life, and that is just not true. I’m just as worthy as the next person, although it took me decades to realize it, and I don’t want anyone else wasting their life away feeling how I used to feel.
What’s your greatest achievement to date? Why are you proud of it?
My greatest achievement to date is writing this book, hands down, 100%. I’m proud of it because being vulnerable is hard. I never used to want to do hard things. My therapist will back this statement up. But ya know what, I did it. I stopped allowing my negative cognitions to hold me back and went for it. I’m also so proud of this book because I know how proud my parents are. Through this book, our relationships have strengthened and they have learned things about me that I have never shared. That has made it really special.
Who has inspired you the most on your journey?
This is probably funny to say, but Karen and Georgia on My Favorite Murder. They work very hard to make talking about mental health and personal struggles a normal topic of conversation. Once I started listening to their podcast, I started feeling ok to share my struggles with my loved ones. I think they’re absolute badasses, and I’m grateful I found their podcast because it made me brave.
Who would you love to meet one day and why?
Glennon Doyle. She is such an inspiration and a warrior for equality. She is constantly encouraging people to share their stories and focuses on the beauty and importance of each individual for who they are. She lives authentically, and I find that really cool.
What do you wish someone told you before you became an entrepreneur/business owner/author?
Writing the book is the easy part. Getting it published is where all the work begins. You need a strong team. Luckily for me, I found one early on. Dr. Nicolya Williams and Kayla Brissi have been my saviors in the publishing space, as well as my editor Erica. I would not have made it through this without them. Also, get a lawyer. If you are writing a non-fiction book, get a lawyer. That thought would have never crossed my mind….until I needed one. It was not the best way to learn, but hey, we made it!
What advice would you like to give others who are on the same or similar journey as you?
Do not give up on yourself. Believe in yourself. It does not matter how many people believe in you, it does not feel comforting until you believe you can do great things. Recognize that self-love comes before any other type of love. If you cannot love yourself and do not think you are worth everything in the universe and more, no one else will. It is not selfish to focus on yourself and put yourself first. That is called self-preservation. Say no when you want to say no without feeling guilty. But don’t say no just because you’re operating on fear. Stop saying “sorry.” We overuse that word unnecessarily. You say sorry when you close someone’s hand in the car door. You don’t say sorry when you need a night alone at home to process your thoughts. And most importantly, it will get better. It always gets better, and I can guarantee you can think of examples in your own life where shit sucked and then … guess what?! IT GOT BETTER!
What’s the best piece of advice that you have received recently?
It is ok to have a bad day. It is perfectly normal. You don’t have to feel bad about or like you are digressing on your growth journey just because your world has a little less sunshine sometimes.
What’s next for you?
I am getting ready to start my blog, which I’m very excited about. I am also getting life coach certified with Dr. Nicolya Williams this summer. I’m looking forward to the learning experience and using it to work on my self-growth and help others.
Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
The possibilities are endless. I know we should all have long-range goals, but I’m kind of seeing where the wind takes me. There are so many promising opportunities on the horizon for me with my book and in my professional career that I’m just going to go with the flow for now. I would love to be working in mental health full time and am interested to see what kind of doors the book has opened.
What can we catch you doing when you’re not working/writing?
You can find me on my Peloton, at West Kept Secret (my favorite Charlotte boutique studio gym), baking cookies, hanging with my parents, or reading a book. Always reading a book.
What book impacted your life the most and why?
Harry Potter. This is probably silly, but it is true. Harry Potter has been a safe space for me throughout my entire life. When I was going through my breakdowns, I would go back to Harry Potter and re-read the books. It gave me so much comfort and made me feel at home. I re-read the books almost yearly now, and I feel the same way every time.
What are three random facts about you?
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I am addicted to reading. If I could have a job there all I do is get paid to read, I would be the happiest girl alive. My dream as a child was to be a bookstore owner.
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If my mom did not hate tattoos, I would have a full sleeve. I’m not sure how this would go down in my professional life, but I am tattoo obsessed.
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Every day after work, I take a walk. I think a good walk with a good podcast is the best medicine there is.
What is your favorite quote?
“As of this very moment, you have made it through 100% of the hard things you thought you’d never survive. You are strong. You are resilient. You CAN do this!” – Faith Broussard Cade, #fleurdelisspeaks
What are your final thoughts that you wish to share with us?
I am over the moon excited for this book and for what the future holds. I hope my story brings hope, peace, and comfort to my readers and that it gives them a little extra strength to keep on fighting for themselves. This journey has been challenging and worth every second. Although the path ahead is always filled with obstacles, the future is bright and always worth chasing.
